What does the future look like...

Wow, I have not written a post in over 1.5 years. I guess isolation seems like as good of time as any to write again.

So it is April 2020. Covid-19 is making a mess of the world right now. There are silver linings of course; like me writing this post, and getting okay sleep, not having to stress out as much about work, etc.
There is also, for me, an introspective side to this period of less work and more isolation. I have been having serious thoughts about leaving my career job and doing something else. I have been feeling this way for quite some time, but this large quantity of personal time has allowed my brain to explore these thoughts in more depth. Of course I have also been watching a ridiculous amount of youtube which also prompts a lot of daydreaming, not sure if that is good or bad...

So what is on my mind? A couple of items stand out.
-I don't like my day job any more. As a 36 year old white male, what are my options? I could go flip burgers or stock shelves anywhere probably, but what if I want to retain some dignity to my previous roles? How do I break out of the hole I have dug myself into by staying in my current role for 7 years?

-Is going back to education a feasible option? another undergraduate degree, a masters, or something foreign even? The caveat to this, of course, is that I need both money to pay for said schooling and resources to keep a roof over my head. I am very much torn on this as it is definitely a way to break into another career path but it comes at huge expense and a system reset for careers.

-Seeing the world. This is probably fueled, in a large part, by my choices of entertainment. reading and watching stories of other people up and leaving the world behind for a "grand adventure" Whether by motorcycle, truck, or boat this option seems the most volatile or risk prone. It also sounds the most satisfying!

So lets explore the mind some more!

Age lonelyness and dating

I am 34. Not terribly old, but aware of my mortality.
Two years ago my life fell apart.
I spent much time in reflection, remorse, self-pity, anger, anxiety over the future. I put myself on display in hopes that somebody !ight notice and help me through such times.
Online dating netted me very little.
Finally somebody noticed and was interested. I was exstatic. Overjoyed.
The problem was that I didn't know how to act or what to do right.

The physical side of me wanted passion, sex, physical contact.
The emotional side of me wanted compassion, familiarity, understanding.

And both sides wanted it now.
Some emotion was met and then physical came about and my mind said no. Suddenly a tailspin, the end. As quickly as it developed it came apart. And why; because I had forced myself to believe what society and media spread: sex and emotion will just spring up like it's nothing. Total bullshit.
I had emotional baggage. She had emotional baggage. We both ran and spat in the face of that and didn't bother to stop for two seconds and talk about it. And because of that we are both now alone again.

As Shakespeare said "it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all." But holy shit will it tear you down.

More online dating

It's been a while since I posted. Feeling a bit bored so thought I would text a little.
More observations from online dating.
-nurses and teachers are majority share of users. I can count on one hand the number of engineers I have come across.
-women will never make the first move. Even on Bumble, which makes the app pointless.
-lots of women have climbed Mt Kilamanjaro. They have a picture of the same sign in their profile. Why is this?
-nobody mentions sex. Very few mention family goals aside from a checkbox.
-an alarming number of accounts are either blank, one line, have one picture, etc. You are not going to get any interest from people interested in a substantive relationship that way.
-girls dressed in...revealing outfits all say they want serious relationships and know what they want. I am highly doubtful of that.
-an alarming number of large women list active lifestyle and healthy eating in their profiles. I think my definition of those must be wrong then. Or if you have a medical condition just talk about it.

As I have said before: all of these apps are based completely around aesthetics. If you are not comfortable with that then go back to the real world. I'm not real happy about it(since I'm not one of the beautiful people) but I am desperately enough to try it out obviously.

Another major gripe of mine is the lack of activity. If I send you a message via one of these aps do me a favor: either respond or block me or something. I have hundreds of single messages sitting in my outbox. Match.com actually shows if they have been read or not and most of them have been. Still no response. Just stupid.

1000 miles! 1000 smiles.

Sitting here, cleaned up, the dust of the road rinsed from my sole. Or is that soul?

Lets start over.

Sipping a tall Coors, eating my ramen, wondering with all these talents how am I still single? I just rode one thousand miles in a weekend. I'm awesome and tired and worn out like an old leather shoe; tired from the miles.
Now I understand that there are people out there that do this in a day, or put on lots more miles going to Sturgis or whatever but the first time you do something significant should be of note. So lets everybody just close our eyes and think back to their first...
Okay I give up lets just talk about motorcycles! 2016 Honda Goldwing F6B Deluxe. Damn near new. I love my job. Sometimes. I asked for some keys and they actually gave them to me, granted I have been riding motorcycles since college and have pretty good training along with owning my own motorcycles so I suppose they had some small reason to let me take it.
Its black. Its got 6 cylinders. Its got five gears? Its got cruise control!
How this whole thing got started is simple: I forgot my mother's birthday. But don't tell her that! So I decided to go for a motorcycle ride to get out of Dodge and see some countryside I had not seen in a while: The Keweenaw Peninsula of Michigan! Having spent summers there as a child I never get tired of visiting but this would be the first time on a motorcycle.

I have dreamed of doing more long distance cruising, but my Indian Chief really wasn't what I had in mind for the job, but this black road missile looked the part: Part 3 parts Goldwing, one part CBR. My kind of cocktail.

I headed north towards God's country after lunch on a Friday. All I had packed was two pairs of socks, my toothbrush, and a hat. Actually that's not true but it sounds good. I burned up the Interstate for about an hour before taking off to the east and into the northwoods. I only had to make it to Michigan which should be about 6 hours away. Unless you take the back roads but lets be honest; Interstates are so boring and straight, it can be painful to ride them. This nimble beast of a machine loved being thrown into corners, The weight of it making it feel planted and sure. Only one time on the whole trip did I feel the weight pushing the bike outward which was my own fault and not the bike! The mini-windscreen and fairing offers the body all of the protection of a long-haul cruiser while still leaving your helmeted head out in the breeze so you get a much more raw feel.

I carved towards Michigan, stopping only to empty the ladder and occasionally fuel up. I had a quick vegeburger dinner in Ironwood, booked a hotel room online and headed into the woods once more. Unfortunately the stretch from Ironwood to Houghton Michigan has few reasonable options for roads once the sun has set and wildlife is abundant, in particular right around sunset. My timing was not ideal in this respect. Luckily I only spotted one deer across this stretch, I tried to stay near cars during this piece as the last thing I want to do is hit a whitetail when they are just starting to grow antlers. If I am taking a deer down with a motorcycle it better be Ole Mossyhorns!

Saturday morning arrived, a sticky 65F outside but the sun was shining bright! After some mediocre hotel breakfast I was ready for the fun section: touring the Peninsula. I left Houghton about 10am, and headed up the northwest face of the Keeweenaw. The roads are some of the best I have ridden. Does the Tail of the Dragon have amazing views of the water? Does Highway 1 have stinky rotten seaweed? Do the Black Hills have...um...The end of the road?
Huzzah! A brisk ride up the rocky and sometimes remote coast will leave you just outside of the Mountain Biking meca of Copper Harbor at, you guessed it, the end of the road. While physically this is not the end of the road; adventure riders can continue eastward all the way to the very tippy tip of the Keweenaw Peninsula if they want. Sealed surface riders will have to be happy with a turn-around and a big sign. It's worth it.

Turning the bike homeward from the end of the road did not mean I was anywhere near home, it was simply lunch times o I went to the beach! I swam in Lake Superior and it was amazing. Just as I remembered it; cold as balls. As the kids say these days. I had some water and ate some carrot cake muffin. See what I was saying about being single? Hard to believe.

I headed south, this time along the eastern shore of the keweenaw. This is a much less traveled route, and the pavement lets you know. There are lots of little pull-offs and lunch stops along the route though, and if you make it all the way south you can even stop at the famous Gay Bar. At this juncture I had seen what I came to see near the lake so I crossed the lift bridge, had a pastie for an early dinner and headed southwest. On the northern route I had stayed inland as there had been wind warnings along the lake, but now I was headed the opposite direction and I hadn't even looked at a forecast in two days to tell me otherwise so I took the much more scenic lake route. From Houghton heading south-west you go through lots of fun little towns; Rockland, Ontanogan, Silver City and finally you arrive at the Porcupine Mountains State Park. Here the State Highway ends, and the South Boundary Road begins. This is a hidden gem of a road. I am reticent to even mention it here so as to keep it peaceful and serene as I found it this weekend. The asphalt does leave a little to be desired, but the turns and undulations make up for it. The Honda purred to life and headed away from the lake and I turned off my music so as to enjoy every last ounce of the road and the scenery. At the southern end I stopped and dipped my feet in the Presque Isle River. Sadly I did not have time to go to the visitor center so a the view from the bridge would have to do.

Around this time I realized that my goal of reaching Ashland, WI was going to happen, so I hopped on the phone when I got to Ironwood and was shocked at the hotel prices. So I made a call and arranged to crash in a guest room in Duluth instead. Its only another hour plus past Ashland...

At this point I should mention something about riding in the upper midwest in the summer: Bugs. Not big Junebug things, tiny flys and mosquitos. I had to stop three times between Ironwood and Duluth to clean my visor. I don't know how you guys without face shields do it. The front of the Honda also appeared to be a buffet of flat bug snacks by the end of the first night, and only got better over the weekend. So despite the quick stops along the route I made it to Duluth by 11pm and zonked right out.

Sunday morning: The last morning before work happens again. Coffee is a necessity today. I think about making a nice breakfast but all I have is peanut butter on toast. Somehow I don't feel that hungry knowing that this is the last day. Once I finnish breakfast I decide that the Bayfield Pennisula, though a large backtrack is the goal for the day. Not as spectacular as the Keweenaw perhaps but it looks less likely to rain there the alternative North Shore. I fuel up, grab waters and trail mix, and away I go. Highway 13 runs around the perimeter of the Bayfield pennisula and takes you through most of the cute little coastal (former) fishing villages as well as the more developed Bayfield area. I stop for a stretch at the Apostle Islands National Lakeshore park at Little Sand Bay. It is a busy campground and launching point for many intrepid kayakers, as well as fishing boats. I think part of my mind wants me to keep walking around since each time I get back on the bike I am getting closer and closer to home and normalcy.
I continue the Penninsula loop and fuel up in Iron River. A quick lunch and I am off to Brule, where I head south into Pine Barrens country. The road is much straighter than I remember it being through here, but still spectacular scenery. My neck and back ache, my bum iches, my feet are going a little numb at times. Maybe being back home isn't the worst thing to happen today. As I approach the Minnesota border the traffic picks up, I get to flex the Honda's power a little getting around slow moving traffic. That breaks up the monotony of the final stretches.

I have this idea in my mind that I am going to pull in the driveway, throw the kickstand down and flop down on my lawn and just sprawl out. It sounds like a movie scene. When I do finally pull in the drive I don't fling myself to the ground though. I just, like a robot on a pre-programmed setting, open the garage door, slowly pull the bike inside, go check the mailbox, unload the bags, and go inside. I peel off my monkey suit. Find a cold beer in the garage fridge and stand in the doorway looking out at the sunny afternoon in my driveway. Gym shorts, dirty smelly Tshirt and flip-flops I take a slow walk around my block. I wave to the neighbors but I'm too tired to talk or introduce myself, they probably think I am crazy. They probably are right but I did something for the first time this weekend and I am proud of it.

Sometimes you just have to take it all off and go swimming. 

In case you were wondering...

Since I was not tenting, packing was very light. I think my rain suit was the single bulkiest item. I could have gotten away with much less if I really was feeling adventurous.

Dating in the age of idiocracy.

Okay, this is a gripe post, sorry in advance if you couldn't care less. :)

So I am on this dating app (yeah yeah, there is not enough cold beer in front of me right now to talk about that) and its really starting to bug me.

Dear single women of the internet:
I understand that you are smart, witty, sarcastic, love dogs, love cats, love tacos, do yoga, run marathons, and love to travel. Would it bother you so much to reply to an email or message? I would like to point out that YOU created your profile, maybe uploaded some pictures, maybe filled out some little bio fields, this implies that you are interested in communicating with potential suitors via said app.
So far the only messages *I* have received have been something along the lines of "hey" which I am unlikely to respond to because there is no actual message; just one word. The messages I send out to attractive ladies read something along the lines of "Hi YourNameHere! I love your #puglife christmas sweater, lol. What make you decide to move back to MN?"
I addressed my subject, I paid a compliment, and I asked a question. How does that not warrant a response? Even "push off ya knob!" would at least be A response and I wouldn't send you any more.

The second situation I have noticed is on the Bumble app. This is the app where you both have to "like" each other, and then the female has to message first. I like this idea, because it is non-traditional and the woman actually has to put some sort of effort in up front as well. BUT the problem I am seeing as I swipe through profiles is the number of profiles that say something to the effect of: "...But I am pretty shy so you'll have to make the first contact." What!? The first problem here is that the man CANNOT message you first. The second problem is why are you on Bumble if you don't want to make the initial contact?? That's the whole premise of the app! Go back to OKC, PoF, Match or real life if you don't want to make contact. sheesh.

Also, please dont consider me shallow since I am basing swipes off of 95% aesthetics, its the nature of these apps, and likely human nature as well. I'm just playing along at this point.

Okay, time for a beer. Enough rambling.

Sailing the world!

Okay, dont worry intrepid readers: I am not actually leaving you all to go live on a boat. Sadly.

What I have been doing is watching a lot of YouTube accounts and vlogs of life aboard different boats. From La vagabonde a 38 foot Beneteau, to Neverland a 1973 Marine Trawler. There are many more from all walks of life, but obviously I am drawn to those that I feel I most identify with. Like Sailing Uma and their 1970s Pearson 36 whose lines and fixtures I recognize a mile away because of my father's Pearson 30!

So something that I think about a lot, since I am a number-crunching engineer, is how these things are possible. I tent to over think and over analyze things so this should not come as a surprise to you. I decided to document two approaches to the live-aboard boat puzzle: The first is that of a young couple with big dreams. The second the solution of more aged and wizened folk with a much larger cash reserve. There are tons of nuances to this whole puzzle so if you have a question about it just ping me and i'll do my best to answer you. I also need to put out the caveat that I do not live aboard a boat so this is all hypothetical, but i do my best to make sound judgments regardless.

Example 1: the youthful adventurer.

This could be interpreted as a single, or couple, my imagination says just out of high school or college. Maybe a couple of summer jobs or working the first "real" job, and pretty small cash reserves. There is a very large prerequisite to making this work: You have to be resourceful and have to be willing to work very hard to get what you want.

Case and point are Billy and Sierra from Tula's Endless Summer. They are a couple young kids with a love for the water and a dream. He bought Tula for $800 but had to restore it. I don't see a price paid for the Neverland but I am guessing it was pretty affordable. But they also have to work on it and finish the work left by previous owners. This requires willingness to work and mechanical ability to build and maintain what they need.

Using a camping stove to cook all your meals on is totally doable, but for many people that does not sound appealing. The same is true of the Sailing Uma crew with their camping stove and dorm room fridge. These are things that I feel most Youtube binge watchers take for granted: simple utilities like a stove and microwave, limitless clean running water, electricity, a soft dry bed.

What about the practical reality? This can be viewed in Bill's video about the cost of living on Neverland:


Now this just talks about the recurring costs, but I like to use the comparison of living on land. The highest rent I ever paid (which was arguably while I was my poorest in college) was $1600/month split a few ways. That was in bum-fizzle minnesota NOT a high-rent area like Miami or Ft. Lauderdale or Sarasota. Currently I have a mortgage and pay about $1100/mo. If I were to have purchased a boat instead of a house I could have got a damn nice trawler or an even nicer sailboat.

At this very moment, when I consulted my credit union's website I see that I could finance a boat older than 2015 for 3.99% for up to 120 months. Reversing the numbers means for the same $1100/mo I pay on my mortgage I could be paying about the same to get around $100,000 to spend on a boat. Mind you my mortgage is for 30 years and this loan term is only 10 years and I only got double with my mortgage. :(

In this light I could have bought a boat like Makena of Moonshadow Sailing; a 42 foot Beneteau Oceanis which would arguably be better than my house! The catch to this opulent spending is that you need to have an income that satisfies your loan and can support these payments for 10 years. That is not easy, especially for younger enthusiasts that dont have the credit background and capital.

I will continue this in another post as it is late and I might have a job interview tomorrow. :)

cheers!
G

Jeep build sheet website!

Found this while looking up diesel grand cherokee information:

Website where Chrysler will spit out the original build options

cheers!